What I thought about "Mockingjay"

"The headache's coming on and my thoughts begin to tangle. I shut my eyes and start to recite silently.

My name is Katniss Everdeen. I am seventeen years old. My home is District 12. I was in the Hunger Games. I escaped. The Capitol hates me. Peeta was taken prisoner. He is alive. He is a traitor, but alive. I have to keep him alive..."

I’ve finished reading “Mockingjay,” the last book in the Hunger Games trilogy, and I can easily sum up my reaction in one word.

Wow.

But does that “wow” translate to an amazed, ecstatic “Wow, that book was awesome! Better than the others!” or does it translate to “Wow, I can’t believe the author did that! That book was horrible!” I honestly think it translates to both. I don’t think I’ve ever had more of an ambiguous reaction to anything in my life. That’s why I’ve waited a few days to post my thoughts on it. I needed to digest everything and come to terms with the ending so I could think about it and get a better grip on my feelings about this book that was…absolutely brutal, from beginning to end.

So many deaths. So many beloved characters’ deaths, especially one that is so shocking and disturbing in the way it is carried out, I dare not even mention it here (for those of you who haven’t read it and want to). I admit it. I felt totally betrayed by this death. I wanted to throw the book against the wall and scream, "Noooooooo!" and not finish it because it was too painful to keep reading. But of course I had to finish it.

While the other books were certainly dark and violent, "Mockingjay" makes it clear from the beginning that these characters are now living in the dark times of war. Battle scenes are scattered throughout the novel, complete with bombings and shootings and worse. In the previous books, Katniss was always incredibly resilient, surviving horrors most of us could never imagine and with her mind and principles still intact. In "Mockingjay," she finally succumbs to the reality of what she has been forced to experience in the previous two books and is portrayed as crippled, both physically and emotionally. Katniss clearly has Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (I actually remember thinking, It's about time, Katniss. You're only human, after all). It's also obvious from page one that Katniss is being used by those around her, and her judgment is flawed. Should she trust the Rebels? Haymitch? Who? It's pretty much left up to the reader to decide. Would the Katniss in the previous books allow herself to so easily be used as a pawn by others? Heck no! But in "Mockingjay," she has clearly changed. However, it doesn't become clear just much she has changed as a character until the final pages of the book, when she ruthlessly commits acts of violence without feeling or showing the remorse or guilt she felt and displayed in the previous two books. I grieved for Katniss as I read those last few chapters. I missed the old Katniss, that young girl we met on page one of "The Hunger Games" who could laugh and smile if the circumstances were right, the same girl who blushed so easily in "Catching Fire" when anyone teased her about being innocent.

I also imagine the author, Suzanne Collins, ripping her hair out in frustration as she surfed message boards for the first two books, before she finished "Mockingjay." The fervent Team Peeta vs. Team Gale debate seemed awfully prevalent before "Mockingjay" was released, given there were much more important themes to talk about within the books. I think the author used "Mockingjay" to make it painfully clear that the point of the story has nothing to do with which suitor Katniss should or would choose. While the book does end with Katniss settling down with one of them, it seems totally unimportant and even grim -- certainly not the happy ending I'm sure most people (including myself) hoped for. Trust me when I say, by the end of "Mockingjay," neither Gale nor Peeta come across as the romantic figures they appeared in the other two books.

It's because "Mockingjay" isn't predictable and doesn't cater to the fans' wishes that I both love and hate it. I'm trying to decide if Suzanne Collins is a genius or a nutcase for that. I certainly can't deny that "Mockingjay" is by far the most powerful book in the series because of this. It paints a harsh portrait of war that is chilling and thought-provoking.

I think the first two books are easier, more fun reads, and that's why I probably won't be reading "Mockingjay" again anytime soon. But I still say if I were a teacher, all three of these books would be taught in my class. Yes, they're all that good. They're all that powerful.